Good job there by you, Yogafire of claiming that I have misunderstood Nandalals’ point by again switching it to something that he himself has not even mentioned. Anyone who reads this thread will quickly discover who is missing the point, and it ain’t me.

Seriously, just because most people are too lazy to read the previous comments and figure it out doesn’t mean we all are.

Awesome! Can I get it published?

I think you’re misunderstanding Nagalingam’s point though Well, actually. He wasn’t talking about pulling himself up by bootstraps. He was talking about how minority group political activists claim to speak for the whole group while only representing the interests of a subset of it. Razib mentioned something similar in a separate thread about regionalism when he mentioned how growing up in the US makes brown people think that what their grandparents did = what “we” do.

In addition, if anyone is missing the point here, it is you, my friend, you are just too blind to see it.

I don’t understand this need for progressives to continually kowtow to the ghosts of organization and political struggles past–especially as what happened and how is continually changed by historical research.

It is somewhat unfortunate that several people came out in support of the thread hijackers but noone supported Taz, who has been a long and truly valued contributor to this blog. Taz was also making a far deeper point of substance compared to the inane banter about dating sites.

I hope this thread stays on track now.

I’m not forgetting – I simply disagree. I do not believe that white privilege is something that cannot really be controlled. I do believe that we can change it – because white privilege is a part of systematic oppression and a system of whiteness that is built into how laws are created, policies developed, and the rules of this nation are lived by. Systems can be changed. South Asians weren’t considered “citizens” in the US until the signing of the Luce-Cellar Act. That is a form of “injustice” against South Asians and how we were able to counteract it with legislation. I am a firm believer in in changing public policy whether with pushing legislation, advocating perspectives to policy makers or lawyering up to change the laws that are in place. It’s the fact that systematic unfairness exists that leads to higher rates of risks of cervical cancer for Desi women than white women or a higher chance of being the victim of a hate crime – to me that is not something I’m willing to simply “bring awareness” to and step away and just say “oh that white privilege, again.” I’m going to change the larger system. And that I can control, through the work that I do and have been doing. I’m not “forgetting” – I just completely disagree.

As for @Nandala – I get it – you don’t have the Desi class privilege. My mother is Teamster who worked in an airport parking lot just to make sure our family had health insurance as my dad bounced job to job until he landed at Home Depot which is where he’s at now. I have two unemployed sisters. I’m unemployed. There are a large amount of Desis that come from situations way worse then me. And you know what, I’m still going to try to do work to serve the community because I want to make sure my family has access to fairness AND that my community of brown people have access to fairness. Because frankly, they have too much on their plate just trying to survive and I know that if I organize, I can help change the system. As for this you got here with your bootstraps and you can make on your own narrative and you don’t need no one else – actually – there are two key pieces of legislation that got you here – one is the Luce Cellar Act mentioned above, and the other is the Immigration and Nationality Act of 1965 – one gave you the right to be considered a citizen, and the other let your people immigrate to this country. And there were organized communities that made sure those acts happened. So don’t think you made it here with your bootstraps when there’s a whole HISTORY that brought you and made you before you became you.

As for “we” – you and me, we are a we, even if you don’t want us to be “we” -ed – because we live in a racialized society that boxes people by race. Whether you like it or not. And “we” have common issues affecting “our” community, whether you like it or not. Though there are probably a great number of statistics out there that can show the clear disparities between “we” and “them”. So how about we just get over it, work to break the disparities that do exist, so that we can do away with the “we” completely?

I’m not sure this is true. While I have never participated in a site because I think they just don’t work (unless you just want a few one night stands), it certainly seems like a legitimate way to meet people…although I do suspect there are many people motivated by desperation nonetheless.

and taz, sorry about going off on a tangent. I meant to address this earlier, but I have a few problems with your post. You say we have “to work even harder to counteract the negativity that is running loose in this country” but I think you are forgetting that racial attacks/injustices/other forms of white privilege are things which we cannot really control, besides spreading awareness. What’s worse than white people denying their white privilege is that many South Asians, I am sorry to say, do too. Though it is comforting to ignore/deny encounters with ‘racism’ (I put that in quotes, because in this modern day, it comes in subtle forms making it harder to recognize) it is harmful and with this attitude, very little progress can be made. Granted, many of us are protected by class privilege (usually only because our parents have it or we prosper in career fields that do not need white skin for advancement ie see medical), but the fact is, and I assure you, we are still not seen as equals. I think a lot of this might go unseen because generally South Asians surround themselves with other south Asians.

However, we do have some power to change the problems within our community. Though very few of us are willing to admit, we come from a culture where domestic violence and child abuse is normalized and even encouraged (not saying this occurs frequently among 1st and 2nd gens, but I am certain it is something they witnessed through their parents’ relationship). Women are pressured to have careers, but also to get married and be mothers. This is detrimental, I have seen too many college (South Asian) girls who later achieved their ardent goal of getting married and pregnant, leaving them to throw away their education, be stay at home mothers and financially dependent on their husbands. Of course there are plenty of South Asian women who don’t care for these things and I have so much respect for them.

Why just in the US swamy? Do you see a difference between Cupid and Shaadi?