Comments on: Sepia Destiny Part II: Dating while Desi

By: yeti

yeti — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 01:00:40 +0000

Don’t worry, I’m finished. Now that Bidismoker and I have found true love, my work here is done.

By: chick pea

chick pea — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:59:56 +0000

No one here needs your “props”.

bidi bhai…remember #359 ta ta.. of to see pet shop boys.. where there are west end girls..sinning…and people that are always on my mind

By: sakshi

sakshi — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:58:09 +0000

I think you meant to say, "I am a full fledged tourist on my way to citizenship." Also acceptable would have been, "I am a full fledged Orientalist on my way to citizenship."

Yeti, I am no fan of PG, but this is getting ridiculous.

By: yeti

yeti — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:58:08 +0000

yes. yes, I do.

By: yeti

yeti — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:56:12 +0000

No, Yeti, I meant to say what I said. I'm not a tourist in India, fortunately or un-fortunately, depending on how you look at it. I am a full fledged resident on my way to citizenship. It is not un-common to hear the word "lingam" used in the Indian circles I move in. Yes, it's in the literature we read also. If one reads those books in their original texts, the word comes up quite often.

I think you meant to say,

"I am a full fledged tourist on my way to citizenship."

Also acceptable would have been,

"I am a full fledged Orientalist on my way to citizenship."

By: HMF

HMF — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:49:31 +0000

I can understand your frustrations, but believe me, females also sometimes have to be the first ones to approach guys they are interested in and often times the first to initiate the first intimate contact. So we have those anxieties as well. Other than reading some dating guide books or talking to friends for pointers, I don't really know what to tell you. It's a jungle out there. Cultural and/or religious guilt can often play a major or minor role in wo/man's life in regards to dating and intimate relationships, especially if s/he is coming from a culture or sub-culture with a strong monastic core, as is common in various buddhist/hindu/christian cultures.

I don't believe Im engaging in a discussion with you, but here goes.

First of all, if your understanding of my frustration is genuine, I thank you, but let it be known my frustration is not some outlier voice, it's shared by many. And don't worry about what to tell me, I had something happen that changed my system of beliefs entirely. Approach anxiety exists for humanity, but the difference is we live in a society that tells men, in order to be men, the onus is on us to overcome it.

By: Quizman

Quizman — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:44:52 +0000

Some advice to the young tykes who have commented here (from a happily married man nearing 40..)

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up. -- Ogden Nash

I wish I didn't talk so much at parties. It isn't that I want to hear My voice assaulting every ear, Uprising loud and firm and clear Above the cocktail clatter. It's simply, once a doorbells' rung, (I've been like this since I was young) Some madness overtake my tongue And I begin to chatter.

Buffet, ball, banquet, quilting bee, Wherever conversation's flowing, Why must I feel it falls on me To keep things going? Though ladies cleverer than I Can loll in silence, soft and idle, Whatever topic gallops by, I seize its bridle, Hold forth on art, dissect the stage, Or babble like a kindergart'ner Of politics till I enrage My dinner partner.

I wish I did'nt talk so much at parties. When hotly boil the arguments, Ah? would I had the common sense To sit demurely on a fence And let who will be vocal, Instead of plunging in the fray With my opinions on display Till all the gentlemen edge away To catch an early local ---Phyllis McGinley

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you

By: Pardesi Gori

Pardesi Gori — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:43:40 +0000

No, Yeti, I meant to say what I said.

I'm not a tourist in India, fortunately or un-fortunately, depending on how you look at it.

I am a full fledged resident on my way to citizenship.

It is not un-common to hear the word "lingam" used in the Indian circles I move in.

Yes, it's in the literature we read also. If one reads those books in their original texts, the word comes up quite often.

Bidi-smoker -

Hey, I gave props to my Indian Desi lovers for being skillful in bed, and my British Desi friend gave props to her Desi men for having Burrito Supreme size lingams.

There is usually a trade-off with anything in this world..... can't always have our cake and eat it too, hai na?

By: Ennis

Ennis — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:35:15 +0000

And where is Razib when he is most needed?

By: yeti

yeti — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 00:31:22 +0000

People laughed at my use of the word lingam, but it's just my habit to say that over penis, something I acquired in India, not from the tourists but from the literature and talks.

I think you meant to say,

"It's just my habit to say that over penis, something I acquired in India. As tourists, we get our language from literature and talks."